Room 206, Saturday Morning

[dwarvenswagger]

When Thorin awoke this morning, he found himself in possession of a number of things that he did not normally have. Chief among them being a bosom.

He squawked indignantly, touching his suddenly bountiful chest and then face to find that he managed grow a fuller beard as a female than as a male. Which. Um. Unfair and rude. But only par for the course since fate was ever cruel to him.

With a sigh, he pushed himself out of bed, wincing as the movement caused things to bounce. He needed to find something to bind his chest down.

[[Door closed, post totally open]]

Comments

[yogurtvore]

Blue was asleep when she heard the squawking. "Thorin?" she asked without opening her eyes or getting out of bed or anything. "You okay over there?"

[dwarvenswagger]

"No, I am not." The voice was decidedly higher in pitch.

[yogurtvore]

"Are you sick?" She still wasn't getting out of bed yet, and it wasn't like she could see through the baroque curtain.

[dwarvenswagger]

Thorin huffed in annoyance, tugging the curtain aside. "Of a sort."

[yogurtvore]

"Well, I'm awake now," Blue declared. "What did you do?"

It was what she would have asked Orla if she'd woken up a boy, so.

[dwarvenswagger]

"I did not do anything!"

OMG you can't just blame someone for waking up with breasts.

[yogurtvore]

"Okay, well--" Blue wondered if 'what did someone else do?' would be a useful question, but discarded it, in typical Blue fashion, in favor of practical concerns. "Do your clothes fit?"

[dwarvenswagger]

"No." And yes, he was sulking about it. "And my chest hurts."

Because nothing was restraining those puppies when he moved around. Busty lady problems.

[yogurtvore]

"I can loan you some clothes," Blue said, "but--we're going to have to get you a bra." Because even if hers would have fit, which did not look likely, she was not about to loan anyone her bra. She had limits.

[dwarvenswagger]

"A bra?" Look, he was from Tolkien, okay?

[yogurtvore]

"It's a thing you wear under your shirt to support your breasts," Blue explained matter-of-factly, because, well, Thorin had them now, there was no use being embarrassed about it. She fished a black t-shirt bra out of her drawer and showed it to him. "Like this." Only his would be bigger.

[dwarvenswagger]

"It seems very small." BECAUSE YOU ARE RANDOMLY BUSTY, THORIN.

It was a sign of the females of his line.

[yogurtvore]

"Boobs come in different sizes, news at eleven. We'll get you one that will fit," she promised, rummaging through her drawers for pants she thought would fit him. Maybe something stretchy. "It's a good thing they roomed us by height," she joked. "At least everything won't be way too short."

[dwarvenswagger]

He'd just end up wearing two sports bras, let's be real here.

"I should give my sister far more credit if this is what she too faces," Thorin grumbled, peering over her shoulder.

[yogurtvore]

"Maybe they have a better system," Blue said.

Whatever they had, she was sure it was way too decorated.

She held out a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt that was pretty loose on her to him and said, "Here, try those on."

[dwarvenswagger]

Thorin gave her a dubious look before accepting the garments. He then slunk back behind the curtain in order to change into them.

"I do not feel secure," he muttered once it was done. Because he wasn't wearing five layers.

[yogurtvore]

"That's because you don't have a bra yet," Blue, who had taken this opportunity to dress quickly (in a dress she'd sewn together from pieces of old t-shirts). "It's fixable." More or less. "You don't have to wear a bra if you don't want to," she felt the need to add, "just, you know, you seem uncomfortable."

[dwarvenswagger]

"You have not proven false to me, so I will trust you on this," Thorin replied. Because he was big ol' drama queen.

Princess, at the moment.

[yogurtvore]

"We'll go shopping," Blue declared. "It'll be fun. Maybe."

[dwarvenswagger]

"I only hope we can find a clothier who can fit dwarves," he said with a quick smile.

And not, you know, clothing meant for the children of men.

[yogurtvore]

"They have all sorts of stuff at that place in town," Blue assured him. "I'm sure we can find something."

Consider who you were shopping with, Thorin, and fear.

[dwarvenswagger]

HE HAD NO IDEA HOW BAD IT COULD BE.

"I should hope they have decent enough fabrics as well." Men did dress a bit shabbily, after all.